It might take a few days of research to get there, or a couple of interviews with experts. But eventually you’ll get to the point where you’ve found the hook, the entry point int your story, and you know you’ve got something good to say. You’re invested, and you care. You’ve earned the right to write about this.

Drawing on research, practical tips and lessons from the worlds of comedy, film, television, politics and sport, Viv Groskop offers a masterclass in how you can access this new form of confidence at any time. All, crucially, with no risk of anyone thinking that you are your own biggest fan.

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Communication is your most valuable skill that CAN and MUST be developed. 30. Don’t talk with an upward pitch It seems to me that she’s describing the exact same thing that I called a ‘stance’ in my previous post. Well, she talks about public speaking, not content or copywriting. But they all come down to rhetoric. And her analysis holds some terrific stance advice for copywriters – and the brands we write for: Ray Dalio banned gossip in his offices. High status people ban it from their entire life. It makes you look terrible. The high status person is gossiped about, not the gossiper. Plus, remember that you have more important things to talk about like that mission from #27. 33. Don’t complain Follow the law of least effort. What can you communicate in a sentence that used to take a paragraph? I don’t think nor care about social hierarchies. I believe that social status is not good or bad, it’s just a tool you can use to help achieve your goals. Just like any other tool, you maximize the benefits and minimize the negatives.

Networking is another great way to practice Happy High Status. Key points to remember when doing this: The high status person has an aura of self love that permeates through every single movement. Every spoken word or idea. Everyone wants to be able to face challenging situations without feeling daunted, intimidated or stressed. But no-one wants to be labelled over-confident, arrogant or smarmy, or to get caught up in their own hype. So how can you feel authentically confident - without the cringe, and without pretending to be something you're not? Samuel’s concern, though, is not so much for the general population as the outliers. “People with existing difficulties – whether related to mental health, finances or family – have had everything made worse by the pandemic. And their ability to get support is diminished because the demand is so great.” My anecdotal research suggests that it’s no longer fun or sexy to mention the pandemic in social situations, but there are people who warm to the idea that we need to guard our recovered confidence carefully. I have had a number of people tell me that they have found solace in doing things more intentionally (an echo of Samuel’s idea): they have specifically created space for socialising and friendships, rather than just allowing those things to happen, as they might have done before the pandemic.

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This is part of making a great first impression. Don’t mess this up. It’s simple but not always easy. 20. Don’t go out of your way to befriend high status people

Just knowing about this phenomenon made me feel less needy and desperate and more reassured and grounded. I still feel a pang of regret about many of the loose-tie friends I haven’t seen since late 2019 or early 2020. People who were work friends I used to see fairly often, but have fallen by the wayside. Or acquaintances who I might have looked forward to seeing often in 2020 and 2021, but who have moved on and whom I’ll probably never see again. It’s reassuring to know that the cultivation of these ties – and the missing of them – is just part of being human. Prof Easthope has spoken recently about the importance in disaster situations of “being told the truth even when it’s unbearable”. This factor connects strongly to my own inconsequential, low-key, low-impact experience. I just wanted to know the reality of the situation so that I could accept it.

High status people have incredible talk in between their ears that allows them to find pleasure in what low status people find painful. 5. Body language

You lower cortisol because it is the stress hormone. Thus making you more calm, more at ease and increase happiness. 4. Have incredible self-talkDon’t be fooled however, this isn’t something you suddenly find and then always have! It ebbs and flows. However the more aware you are of what’s going on for you, the easier it becomes to find it when you really need it! I’m currently reading “ How to own the room” by Viv Groskop, a book designed to help women become more confident speakers. It analyses famous women’s speeches – Michelle Obama’s, Chimamanda Ngoze Adichie’s, JK Rowling’s etc — and pulls out certain characteristics of their speaking style that make them exceptional. It’s a pretty good read (probably works for most blokes, too) and it’s got a few excellent bits. One of them is the idea of “happy high status”: Groskop goes on to argue that “happy high status” isn’t actually conferred by society. It’s an inner attitude that anyone can achieve, regardless of social hierarchy. And when it’s genuine, it’ll make your public speech resonate like nothing else — because it transmits that you’re at ease, happy where you’re at, and not trying to hide anything. But – and this is key – it’s impossible to fake happy high status. Groskop hosts an excellent podcast about public speaking called How To Own The Room, and this book does have a focus on speech giving and presentations. But I also found its ideas really useful in other areas of my life, and it would also definitely be useful to anyone looking for the confidence to expand their #bookstagram presence.